Valentine’s Day can be a day of love and connection for many, but for those who have recently gone through a breakup, it can bring about feelings of loneliness, sadness, or even anger. However, instead of letting these emotions consume you, it’s important to remember that you are not alone and that you have the power to rewrite your own narrative. This Valentine’s Day, take the opportunity to focus on yourself and practice self-love and growth.
Malminder Gill, a celebrity hypnotherapist and therapist, shares her insights on how to navigate through heartbreak and come out stronger. “As a therapist, I have helped many people overcome heartbreak, including myself,” she says. “It can be a challenging period in our lives, but we can navigate these feelings with strategies that build self-compassion and emotional resilience.”
One of the first steps in reclaiming Valentine’s Day is to reframe it. It doesn’t have to be solely about romantic love. Consider it as a chance to celebrate other forms of love, such as self-love and appreciation for friends and family. Remember, you are in control of honoring what is important to you and your needs. “Plan a self-care day filled with activities you enjoy,” suggests Gill. “Watch your favorite film, cook a comforting meal, or indulge in a spa day. Make the day about celebrating you.”
It’s also important to acknowledge and process your feelings. It’s natural to experience a mix of emotions after a breakup, such as grief, nostalgia, frustration, or sadness. Instead of ignoring or suppressing these feelings, give yourself permission to feel them. “Set a timer for 15 minutes,” Gill advises. “Write a letter to yourself expressing how you feel and then throw it away. It doesn’t need to be perfect or even make sense – let it flow naturally. The goal is to let your emotions out in a safe, expressive manner.”
Healing from a breakup takes time. Be patient with yourself and remember that Valentine’s Day is just one day. It doesn’t define your worth or future happiness. “Celebrate small wins,” says Gill. “If it helps you see the bigger picture, write these wins down to track your progress.”
Limiting social media use can also be beneficial. Scrolling through social media and seeing posts of happy couples or your ex can be triggering. “Take a break from social media for the day,” suggests Gill. “Remove the apps from your phone temporarily or even put your phone and computer away for the day and instead focus on being present with yourself or others.”
Connecting with supportive people can also help combat loneliness. Reach out to friends or family who can offer comfort and distraction. Spending time with people who care about you can remind you that you’re not alone and that love exists in many forms. “Organize a celebration with friends,” says Gill. “Gather your close friends for a fun evening, whether it’s a film night or a shared meal.”
Shifting your focus to gratitude can also help reframe negative thoughts. Having gratitude for things around you can foster a sense of hope and resilience. “Write down three things you’re grateful for each day,” Gill suggests. “They can be as simple as having water to drink, the sunshine, or the support of a good friend. Then, close your eyes, place your hands over your heart and feel the gratitude rise within your body as you give thanks for these things.”
If feelings of sadness or hopelessness persist, seeking professional support is always an option. Consider reaching out to a therapist or counselor who can provide a safe space to explore your emotions and equip you with tools to heal and move forward. “Research mental health providers or online therapy options,” says Gill. “Sometimes, just taking the action of seeking help can bring immediate relief knowing someone is there to support you.”
Valentine’s Day can be a challenging day for those healing from a breakup, but it’s also an opportunity to practice self-love and focus on personal growth. By prioritizing your well-being and taking steps to nurture your mental health, you can embrace this day with strength and confidence. Remember, putting yourself first is empowering, and you are deserving of love, especially from yourself.
Derick is an experienced reporter having held multiple senior roles for large publishers across Europe. Specialist subjects include small business and financial emerging markets.